There are a lot of people who say that the hardest part is starting over. That the hardest part is beginning something new. I say the hardest part is the end.
I am ending one part of my life and beginning a whole new chapter. I'm starting from scratch. I won't know anybody, and I'll be in an unfamiliar place. In short, I'm going to a new school and I'm moving. This is most likely the last day I had to spend with everyone.
I'm shaking as I right this because I'm in pain. And annoyingly enough, in near tears. It pains me to know that I'm leaving everyone I love and treasure deeply behind. I've moved and changed schools before, but I was never as attached to other places like I am this one. It hurts me to know that after this my closest friends are leaving too. We're splitting up and carrying on with our lives. I know this might seem selfish, but I wish that everything could stay the same. That, this day, would never end.
I guess, I've grown so dependent on them to be there for me. But trying to tie my friends down would be like trying to capture the air. I know for a fact, even if we could stay together, if we could stay the same, they would choose to go on. They would choose to leave, because they would know and want better. They'd want to grow and live their own lives.
I know theres email and such but, is that really the same? Would it be the same as talking to them in person, seeing them laugh or smile? I dont think so. . . . . .
But, somethings gotta give right? Nothing can stay the same forever. If it did where would be the adventure? What would we really learn? If we'd learn anything at all.
In the end, I know things need to change. And if it didnt there would be no point. There would be no point in having friends, we wouldnt learn anything from each other. There'd be no point in doing anything, because there would be no adventure. So, even though, the end is the hardest part for me, I know that there will always be endings, and with each ending is a new beginning. All I can do is live in the moment, and make the most of the time I have right now.
Love,
A sad Yuuka
Friday, June 26, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Regents and Dancing
Heyllo, just wanted to clarify this, a regents is a state wide exam. It is a three hour test that is given at the end of the school year to test your knowledge on a course that you took. I took the Integrated Algebra Regents as well as the Earth Science Regents. Within the coming years I will be taking a lot more regents.
And I love to dance. I take dance as a subject in school and I occassionally dance around my house like a maniac.
Anyway, theres love, jealousy, problems and drama filling the sweet not-too-clean air. And that can only mean one thing. That summer is here. So if you want help with anything just ask.
And along with asking for help, you can ask pretty much anything. And I'll see what I can do in order to awnser your question. . . . .. . . . . . Wow, I began three paragraph thingies in a row with the letter A. . . . . . . . .O.o
Your friend,
Yuuka
And I love to dance. I take dance as a subject in school and I occassionally dance around my house like a maniac.
Anyway, theres love, jealousy, problems and drama filling the sweet not-too-clean air. And that can only mean one thing. That summer is here. So if you want help with anything just ask.
And along with asking for help, you can ask pretty much anything. And I'll see what I can do in order to awnser your question. . . . .. . . . . . Wow, I began three paragraph thingies in a row with the letter A. . . . . . . . .O.o
Your friend,
Yuuka
Friday, June 19, 2009
All Done!!!
I am finally over and done with the regents. Ama and Haru have to take the spanish proficiency ( did I mention that I was really bad at spelling?) on Monday. And sadly I have to go to school on that day. . . . . .Oh, well. Its not like I have much better to do anyway.
I'm still ready and waiting for questions and such. Even if its something totally random, I dont mind.
From,
An excruciatingly bored Yuuka
I'm still ready and waiting for questions and such. Even if its something totally random, I dont mind.
From,
An excruciatingly bored Yuuka
Thursday, June 18, 2009
One More to go!
I ONLY HAVE TO TAKE ONE MORE REGENTS THIS YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wow. . . . . . . . I think I'm still hyper from yesturday. Anyway, I took the science regents yersturday and tomorrow I have to take the Math Intergrated Algebra Regents. . . . . . . .long name. . . . . I just hope I do well, theres nothing much I can do now because ther is no way I'm going to try and study. . . . . I'll just forget everything.
"Que sera, sera." What ever happens, happens. Whatever will be will be.
Your friend,
A slightly hyper Yuuka
"Que sera, sera." What ever happens, happens. Whatever will be will be.
Your friend,
A slightly hyper Yuuka
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Science Regents
FINALLY!!!!! I have finally gotten the science regents done. It was okay. I fifnished just within 2 hours, I wasnt rushing or anything, I was actually taking my time. I feel sorry for Ama though. She had to rewrite everythign in pen.
But at least its over and done with. And now on to the Math regents. Ama, Haru and I are taking it this friday. Ugh. But hopefully we'll be over prepared. Our math teacher likes to fry our brians with math problems. She thinks its fun.
Anywho, if anyone wants to ask me anything I'm ready and waiting. Whether it be about me or for advice, I'm open.
A friend,
Yuuka
But at least its over and done with. And now on to the Math regents. Ama, Haru and I are taking it this friday. Ugh. But hopefully we'll be over prepared. Our math teacher likes to fry our brians with math problems. She thinks its fun.
Anywho, if anyone wants to ask me anything I'm ready and waiting. Whether it be about me or for advice, I'm open.
A friend,
Yuuka
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
No Relaxation
I have officailly no time to relax or have fun at school. I have to take the science regents (which I'm taking tomorrow) and the math regents. And so my whole class is being pulled out of all of the fun classes and instead we have to go over and practice regents. Now if it had only been Math it wouldnt really be a problem but since our Spanish teacher is also pulling us out of certian classes, its really annoying (most of my class has to take the spanish proficiency test, not me though). And I'm hispanic (though I dont usually speak very much spanish)!
The major problem is that everyone around us, our parents, teachers, and even some friends are pressuring us to do well. Which, in turn, stresses us out even more than we normally would be. So now with everyone else pressuring us, our high school is pressuring us too. UGH!!!!! A lot of this can be really frustrating, and most people (seemingly the adults) dont understand this. All we can do is suck it up, study like hell and hope for the best.
Thats really it for today. If anyone has any questions to ask, ask away. And I'll get back to you soon. If anyone needs anything just ask.
A friend,
Yuuka
Oh! and Tony, its great to have you back.
The major problem is that everyone around us, our parents, teachers, and even some friends are pressuring us to do well. Which, in turn, stresses us out even more than we normally would be. So now with everyone else pressuring us, our high school is pressuring us too. UGH!!!!! A lot of this can be really frustrating, and most people (seemingly the adults) dont understand this. All we can do is suck it up, study like hell and hope for the best.
Thats really it for today. If anyone has any questions to ask, ask away. And I'll get back to you soon. If anyone needs anything just ask.
A friend,
Yuuka
Oh! and Tony, its great to have you back.
Monday, June 15, 2009
How well do other people know you?
This question has bothered me for a while. Mainly because I ask myself how well do other people. And that comes around to how well do people know me. The awnser to that? Not very well.
I figured, when I was younger, that i should never let anyone close to me. Because in the end all it did was hurt. So I built up walls and masks, to try to hide and keep the real me safe from peoples prying eyes. And as I grew I found that I was okay. I never let anyone get too close and hurt me. But I had never let anyone close enough to love me for who I was. I was solitary and at the time, I liked it that way. I made friends, yeah. But they would always get a mask. Then, I moved, and I wanted to try something different, to start fresh, and I did. I took down a few of my walls and got rid of most of my masks. And it worked, somewhat. I actually started to care more, and get more attatched to the people I met. Therefore, when they hurt me, it really hurt. A lot.
And eventually what happened is that I had to stop friendships which killed me inside. Because other people were hurting. I guess I have to go back a bit. When I was younger, i was around my father who was drunk on occasion and he went through G.F. after G.F. An it was as if he was going through them like tissues. So I promised myself that I would care about people more to make up for what my father did. . . . . .and thats were my problem formed. I pulled down walls and I started to care a lot more. Caring for me is like a double edged sword. On one side it can help people, and keepthem smiling and laughing, on the other side, it can hurt me greatly. And, because of my caringness (is that even a word?) I was used, and walked on (though, theres this quote from Kanye West that said "If your not used your useless" or something along those lines). So, thst in turn made me a bit more sensitive then others would think. Then, I created another mask, my mask of strength. It helped me fool others, or what I had thought was fooling other into believing I was okay. And I wasnt. I went home and cryed practically every night. Thats when I found my friends who were able to climb over my walls and see me for who I was. Which is what I had said happened in my preivious post.
Anyway, it still always has me wondering. How much do I let people know me? I dont even know the anwser to that question. But I want you to anwser it. How much do you let people know you?
I figured, when I was younger, that i should never let anyone close to me. Because in the end all it did was hurt. So I built up walls and masks, to try to hide and keep the real me safe from peoples prying eyes. And as I grew I found that I was okay. I never let anyone get too close and hurt me. But I had never let anyone close enough to love me for who I was. I was solitary and at the time, I liked it that way. I made friends, yeah. But they would always get a mask. Then, I moved, and I wanted to try something different, to start fresh, and I did. I took down a few of my walls and got rid of most of my masks. And it worked, somewhat. I actually started to care more, and get more attatched to the people I met. Therefore, when they hurt me, it really hurt. A lot.
And eventually what happened is that I had to stop friendships which killed me inside. Because other people were hurting. I guess I have to go back a bit. When I was younger, i was around my father who was drunk on occasion and he went through G.F. after G.F. An it was as if he was going through them like tissues. So I promised myself that I would care about people more to make up for what my father did. . . . . .and thats were my problem formed. I pulled down walls and I started to care a lot more. Caring for me is like a double edged sword. On one side it can help people, and keepthem smiling and laughing, on the other side, it can hurt me greatly. And, because of my caringness (is that even a word?) I was used, and walked on (though, theres this quote from Kanye West that said "If your not used your useless" or something along those lines). So, thst in turn made me a bit more sensitive then others would think. Then, I created another mask, my mask of strength. It helped me fool others, or what I had thought was fooling other into believing I was okay. And I wasnt. I went home and cryed practically every night. Thats when I found my friends who were able to climb over my walls and see me for who I was. Which is what I had said happened in my preivious post.
Anyway, it still always has me wondering. How much do I let people know me? I dont even know the anwser to that question. But I want you to anwser it. How much do you let people know you?
Thursday, June 11, 2009
NonExistant
Everyone has their moments when they want to change thier past, right? Well, what would you change? What would happen if you changed it? How would you be different now? Would you be different?
My past isnt the greatest and it varies in color depending on where you look. And sometimes I look back and wish I could change something I did, or said. A lot of the time its those moments when I hurt the people closest to me. And some of them are when people hurt me. Then, I have those moments where I wished I didnt exist at all. But then I think of the butterfly effect.
The butterfly effect is when something in the past is changed and everything else changes. It states that even if you change something small, like what shoes you wore, and such. When I think of this I think of the people I met and what would happen to them if I wasnt there. I dont want to sound like a snob, and I'm not trying to, but I think of all the people I met and helped. I think of all the times I was able to smile, all the friends I made. And then I start thinking about the what ifs.
After a while, (and every time I think about it) I realize that I love the way my life is. I love the people I met, even if they did me wrong. I love them because they helped make me who I am today. They hepled me get through bigger challenges. Because all those people, who hurt me, who left me, (which are quite a few) helped make me stronger. And over time I saw who my real friends and family are.
Your family doesnt have to be blood related, your family are the people who love you for you. They are the people who have seen you at your worst and your best. They are the people who have seen you cry and seen you happy. They are the people that will catch you if you fall. I have got to say, it took me a long time to figure that out. And it took the people who I thought was closest to leave me. And I fell into this useless cycle of hating myself. And I smiled even though it hurt and I laughed even though I wanted to cry. I tried to hide how I felt from the people who could see pasts all my masks. And I hurt them. A lot. One day a bunch of them came up to me and told me that they knew and understood what I was going through. And i told them everything, I told them all about my past and what I had been through. And I cried And cried and cried until I could cry anymore. And they were still there. Thats when I learned who my family was.
So in the end, even if I had the chance to change something in my past, I wouldnt. I would keep everything the way it is. Yeah my past is painful and scary but it is also happy and fun. For me, the option of changing my past is nonexistant. Because I have learned how to except myself as well as the people around me for who they are.
And for one friend out there, you should know this too. You have people who love you and care about you. You have no idea how lucky you are. And I understand about the whole family thing, I get it. And I know it hurts like crazy. But trust me you will make it through. And I know your whole pack would back me up on this but they love you, they really do. To them you are thier family. You have been there to help so many of them, now let them help you. And belive me, there will always be people to help you out. Even in the darkest of nights, there is always a light that can help you find your way.
Love,
Yuuka
My past isnt the greatest and it varies in color depending on where you look. And sometimes I look back and wish I could change something I did, or said. A lot of the time its those moments when I hurt the people closest to me. And some of them are when people hurt me. Then, I have those moments where I wished I didnt exist at all. But then I think of the butterfly effect.
The butterfly effect is when something in the past is changed and everything else changes. It states that even if you change something small, like what shoes you wore, and such. When I think of this I think of the people I met and what would happen to them if I wasnt there. I dont want to sound like a snob, and I'm not trying to, but I think of all the people I met and helped. I think of all the times I was able to smile, all the friends I made. And then I start thinking about the what ifs.
After a while, (and every time I think about it) I realize that I love the way my life is. I love the people I met, even if they did me wrong. I love them because they helped make me who I am today. They hepled me get through bigger challenges. Because all those people, who hurt me, who left me, (which are quite a few) helped make me stronger. And over time I saw who my real friends and family are.
Your family doesnt have to be blood related, your family are the people who love you for you. They are the people who have seen you at your worst and your best. They are the people who have seen you cry and seen you happy. They are the people that will catch you if you fall. I have got to say, it took me a long time to figure that out. And it took the people who I thought was closest to leave me. And I fell into this useless cycle of hating myself. And I smiled even though it hurt and I laughed even though I wanted to cry. I tried to hide how I felt from the people who could see pasts all my masks. And I hurt them. A lot. One day a bunch of them came up to me and told me that they knew and understood what I was going through. And i told them everything, I told them all about my past and what I had been through. And I cried And cried and cried until I could cry anymore. And they were still there. Thats when I learned who my family was.
So in the end, even if I had the chance to change something in my past, I wouldnt. I would keep everything the way it is. Yeah my past is painful and scary but it is also happy and fun. For me, the option of changing my past is nonexistant. Because I have learned how to except myself as well as the people around me for who they are.
And for one friend out there, you should know this too. You have people who love you and care about you. You have no idea how lucky you are. And I understand about the whole family thing, I get it. And I know it hurts like crazy. But trust me you will make it through. And I know your whole pack would back me up on this but they love you, they really do. To them you are thier family. You have been there to help so many of them, now let them help you. And belive me, there will always be people to help you out. Even in the darkest of nights, there is always a light that can help you find your way.
Love,
Yuuka
Monday, June 8, 2009
Over and Done With
Heyllo, I am officailly over and done with all the drama, in school and such. Its getting way too much to deal with at the end of the year.
Anyway, on a lighter note, I am a huge fan of R.J.A. a.k.a Red Jump Siut Apparaus!!!! It is and awsome band. If you've heard of it great, if not listen to it!
Thats it for today. Other than my spring Concert later. It should be at least somewhat entertaining. And the Prom tomorrow. . . . . . . .
Thats really all I have to say. If you think I might find something interesting go ahead and tell me about it. If you wanna talk I'll see what I can do about using and email adress of Mine. . . . .Thats it for today.
Your friend,
Yuuka
Anyway, on a lighter note, I am a huge fan of R.J.A. a.k.a Red Jump Siut Apparaus!!!! It is and awsome band. If you've heard of it great, if not listen to it!
Thats it for today. Other than my spring Concert later. It should be at least somewhat entertaining. And the Prom tomorrow. . . . . . . .
Thats really all I have to say. If you think I might find something interesting go ahead and tell me about it. If you wanna talk I'll see what I can do about using and email adress of Mine. . . . .Thats it for today.
Your friend,
Yuuka
Friday, June 5, 2009
Speachless
Hey, It's Yuuka. And I am officially speechless. Why? Because it seems that some people can be so determined that they underestimate a persons will.
It infuriates me that someone would think that after I end something, they refuse to except my position and choice that I made. And you see, I firmly closed that door with lock and key but this person still trys to reopen it. With absolutely no concern about who she (whoops, oh well,) hurts while doing so.
If you want the full story, here it is. A friendship formed between me and this person. And at first, it was fun. but as time went on I realized that I was starting to be tossed around like a rag doll or some toy. And one day, this person, decides to become mute. Not to everyone just me. I said Hi and She gave me a look. A look. thats it, no response at all. And it hurt, badly. If your close friend suddenly wouldnt say a word around you how would that make you feel? And this went on for a while. And pretty much every night i would come home and cry because I was so upset. Because dispite my efforts to be nice, have fun around that person, and make them smile, all I would get was pain. And so I though, you know what I'm ready to move on. and I started to. When she decided she wanted me back. You know what the excuse was? "I dont want it to hurt a lot when we graduate." that was their reason. And was I heard that I nearly cried, right then and there. then I explained that they just caused me so much pain. And they apologized and that was enough for me. I tried again. And around 2 weeks ago, we were talking on aim, I said that she was being a hypocrite, and she flipped out on me. And cursed at me. I mean, even I can fully admit to being a hypocrite. So this time I closed the door for real. Immediately after she cursed she signed off. so I emailed her saying that I wont be treated like that anymore. And I'm done with dealing with her.
That was when I was done. Here's what happened next. She sent me an email apologizing. Saying that she was over reacting. I didnt reply. Later her friend sent me an email that showed me her "Choices." It was either run away. Or stay. And this is when I sent her a message that said If you runaway then she would be dead to me. And I know that is not the nicest of things to say but it's true. You cant run away from your problems. they will come back and haunt you. So, she sent me an email saying how I wasnt supposed to find out and that crap. And once again, more excuses. And I replied saying that I no longer care about what she does, or what her choices are. I'm done. I'm done with you and all the pain you caused me. I said I was finished.
So school rolls around and I have "friendly" conversations with her. Mainly because I didnt need the whole world to know my business. And she decides to call me yesterday, and say that shes sorry for everything shes put me through. And she thanked me for being there for her. Saying that she loved me and I was her best friend. She also said that she understood that I didnt want to be friends with her anymore, "But I wont except that." And it left me in an angered speechless moment.
So that is why I'm pissed and I'm not so speechless anymore. If the person I'm talking about is reading this, know that no matter what you say or do, the friendship that we once shared is done. I closed that door. And it will not be reopened.
From,
A not so speechless Yuuka
It infuriates me that someone would think that after I end something, they refuse to except my position and choice that I made. And you see, I firmly closed that door with lock and key but this person still trys to reopen it. With absolutely no concern about who she (whoops, oh well,) hurts while doing so.
If you want the full story, here it is. A friendship formed between me and this person. And at first, it was fun. but as time went on I realized that I was starting to be tossed around like a rag doll or some toy. And one day, this person, decides to become mute. Not to everyone just me. I said Hi and She gave me a look. A look. thats it, no response at all. And it hurt, badly. If your close friend suddenly wouldnt say a word around you how would that make you feel? And this went on for a while. And pretty much every night i would come home and cry because I was so upset. Because dispite my efforts to be nice, have fun around that person, and make them smile, all I would get was pain. And so I though, you know what I'm ready to move on. and I started to. When she decided she wanted me back. You know what the excuse was? "I dont want it to hurt a lot when we graduate." that was their reason. And was I heard that I nearly cried, right then and there. then I explained that they just caused me so much pain. And they apologized and that was enough for me. I tried again. And around 2 weeks ago, we were talking on aim, I said that she was being a hypocrite, and she flipped out on me. And cursed at me. I mean, even I can fully admit to being a hypocrite. So this time I closed the door for real. Immediately after she cursed she signed off. so I emailed her saying that I wont be treated like that anymore. And I'm done with dealing with her.
That was when I was done. Here's what happened next. She sent me an email apologizing. Saying that she was over reacting. I didnt reply. Later her friend sent me an email that showed me her "Choices." It was either run away. Or stay. And this is when I sent her a message that said If you runaway then she would be dead to me. And I know that is not the nicest of things to say but it's true. You cant run away from your problems. they will come back and haunt you. So, she sent me an email saying how I wasnt supposed to find out and that crap. And once again, more excuses. And I replied saying that I no longer care about what she does, or what her choices are. I'm done. I'm done with you and all the pain you caused me. I said I was finished.
So school rolls around and I have "friendly" conversations with her. Mainly because I didnt need the whole world to know my business. And she decides to call me yesterday, and say that shes sorry for everything shes put me through. And she thanked me for being there for her. Saying that she loved me and I was her best friend. She also said that she understood that I didnt want to be friends with her anymore, "But I wont except that." And it left me in an angered speechless moment.
So that is why I'm pissed and I'm not so speechless anymore. If the person I'm talking about is reading this, know that no matter what you say or do, the friendship that we once shared is done. I closed that door. And it will not be reopened.
From,
A not so speechless Yuuka
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Placement Test
Heyllo, It's Yuuka here. I am taking my placement test tomorrow. Ugh! And I was supposed to get this day off. But noooooo, they had to just take the one day we want of break away.
*shrug* Oh well. Anyway, I am very bored and very tired so Ima go.
And Tony, Danny, if they email/ give you a letter again dont forget to tell. I havent thought of anything yet but I will soon. And I know that I've said this before, but Kimi and I are behind you all the way.
From,
An Annoyed Yuuka
P.s. Kimi says Hi. And a long list of other things but I really dont feel like typing it all. . . . . . .In general shes cursing out those haters. She is very determined to make them pay but she hasnt thought of anything yet.
Bye
*shrug* Oh well. Anyway, I am very bored and very tired so Ima go.
And Tony, Danny, if they email/ give you a letter again dont forget to tell. I havent thought of anything yet but I will soon. And I know that I've said this before, but Kimi and I are behind you all the way.
From,
An Annoyed Yuuka
P.s. Kimi says Hi. And a long list of other things but I really dont feel like typing it all. . . . . . .In general shes cursing out those haters. She is very determined to make them pay but she hasnt thought of anything yet.
Bye
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Bored out of my mind ~Kimi
I am officially bored out of my freaking mind. Today, I was forced to take the Social Studies State exam. Ugh. And then I had to act, again. And tomorrow I'm going to have to take part to of the socail studies exam. Along with acting.
Yuuka is hiding at the moment in some extremely brightly lit room. Which is actually is giving me a head ache. Yes, bright light can give me a serious headache if I'm there too long. What I will do in the summer? No idea.
I guess I'm laking some inspiration today. Cause at the moment I'm just rambling. Oh well, it seems like you people dont really care if I ramble or not. . . . . . . .I am just really tired and bored. And I'm getting a head ache.
OH!!!1 Update. Sam is doing better. . . . . .somewhat. Shes still hiding away but she came out of her hole during the weekend.
-Kimi
P.S. Some of you will get this some of you wont but, three minds one body.
Yuuka is hiding at the moment in some extremely brightly lit room. Which is actually is giving me a head ache. Yes, bright light can give me a serious headache if I'm there too long. What I will do in the summer? No idea.
I guess I'm laking some inspiration today. Cause at the moment I'm just rambling. Oh well, it seems like you people dont really care if I ramble or not. . . . . . . .I am just really tired and bored. And I'm getting a head ache.
OH!!!1 Update. Sam is doing better. . . . . .somewhat. Shes still hiding away but she came out of her hole during the weekend.
-Kimi
P.S. Some of you will get this some of you wont but, three minds one body.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Cut the Crap ~Kimi
As most of you already know, I'm Kimi,Yuuka's friend. And I am telling everyone I know and everyone who is willing to listen, to cut the crap.
I have officially had enough with people acting nice towards others when its totally fake. What is it? Are you AFRAID to tell others how you feel? Are you AFRAID about what they'll say? I mean honestly I think all of humanity has got this problem. Humans are AFRAID of one another. They are AFRAID of what they can do. So they make alliances with people they barely know and hope to have them help you out when its time to fight.
Okay, maybe I should explain myself first. Technically speaking I am not human. I'm a demon, or demigod. . . . .Whatever the hell you want to call it. And no I do not look insane or devil like I am look just like a normal person. But I'm not. No I cannot control the underworld or zombies. I can actually control something. . . . . . But anyway.
I want all of you reading this to tell some one how you really feel, at least once in the next week. I have been around too many people who just through their opinions away. Too many people I know are willing to fake a smile and laugh even though their in pain. CUT THE GOD DAMNED CRAP AND TELL PEOPLE WHAT YOUR GOING THROUGH FOR ONCE!!!!!!!! I know that not telling people how you feel is supposed to stop them from worrying about you. But the truth is, it doesnt. Most of the time, the people your lieing too can tell that something is wrong. And it hurts them. It HURTS!
I know, because it's happened to me. I have had friends, people I know and love, lie about how their feeling. They lie to make me feel better. But what if you knew you where really killing them inside? What if you knew that they would stress themselves out because of you? What if you knew? What would you do then?
Most, or some of you rather, can see where I'm coming from (hopefully). I know people are hard to trust. Because, all of us, can be cruel and hurtful even when we dont mean to be. But reach out anyway. Take that hand thats waiting.
And cut the crap.
-Kimi
I have officially had enough with people acting nice towards others when its totally fake. What is it? Are you AFRAID to tell others how you feel? Are you AFRAID about what they'll say? I mean honestly I think all of humanity has got this problem. Humans are AFRAID of one another. They are AFRAID of what they can do. So they make alliances with people they barely know and hope to have them help you out when its time to fight.
Okay, maybe I should explain myself first. Technically speaking I am not human. I'm a demon, or demigod. . . . .Whatever the hell you want to call it. And no I do not look insane or devil like I am look just like a normal person. But I'm not. No I cannot control the underworld or zombies. I can actually control something. . . . . . But anyway.
I want all of you reading this to tell some one how you really feel, at least once in the next week. I have been around too many people who just through their opinions away. Too many people I know are willing to fake a smile and laugh even though their in pain. CUT THE GOD DAMNED CRAP AND TELL PEOPLE WHAT YOUR GOING THROUGH FOR ONCE!!!!!!!! I know that not telling people how you feel is supposed to stop them from worrying about you. But the truth is, it doesnt. Most of the time, the people your lieing too can tell that something is wrong. And it hurts them. It HURTS!
I know, because it's happened to me. I have had friends, people I know and love, lie about how their feeling. They lie to make me feel better. But what if you knew you where really killing them inside? What if you knew that they would stress themselves out because of you? What if you knew? What would you do then?
Most, or some of you rather, can see where I'm coming from (hopefully). I know people are hard to trust. Because, all of us, can be cruel and hurtful even when we dont mean to be. But reach out anyway. Take that hand thats waiting.
And cut the crap.
-Kimi
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